Time to rock this bitch
Bird in the oven
Table set with many forks
Time to rock this bitch
Guests are on the way
Rejecting Ina Garten
They want my cookies
Mastered phony smile
And the empty heartless laugh
Make them think I care
No record of jail
But the golden carving shanks
From my friend Large Marge
Michelle Obama
Will bring special homemade pie
Feed it to the dogs
Duck pate for all
Plus a chicken nugget meal
For that Bieber kid
Manilow carols
Annoyingly every year
Forgets he’s a Jew
Oprah and Tyra
Try to show each other up
My ego must win
Goody bags at exit
But just give fruitcakes to tools
Who don’t use coasters
I’m changing the world
Rescuing souls from Chili’s
True Christmas savior
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