Sherlock Brolmes: Frat Detective, Part I
“WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM?” screamed Sherlock Brolmes into his cell phone before flinging it across the room in a drunken rage. “Another black North Face jacket?” I asked. “I am a…
Articles by Jacko
Clowning
Origins of Cheap Alcohol
1. Franzia Caprese, Italy, 1972: Maria: “Quick, Gabriella, step on those grapes faster! Franz the Giant Baby, he grows thirsty!” Gabriella: “I am trying as hard as I can, but my feet, they grow tired….
Who Killed JFK? : Your History Professor
By Your History Professor Well, you see, there is academic consensus that Kennedy was killed by a man named Lee Harvey Oswald. Did he really do it? Was it someone else? These questions are rather…
Who Killed JFK? : Some Dude
By: Somebody We all know JFK died, right? But did you know that some guy killed him? Totally wicked! Apparently this guy waits on a hill with a gun and shoots JFK in the head. …
Who Killed JFK? : Fashion
By an anonymous tip from “a very important fashion designer” On a sunny day in 1968 Dallas, Texas, a woman reclined on a grassy knoll, extending her long, ghostly pale white legs to let them…
Who Killed JFK? : The Consumption
By Wendleton the Street Urchin ‘Twere the consumption that killed JFK, if I may say so me-self. Yes, and a rightly bad case of it at that. He were in a poorly way from all…
Who Killed JFK? : Box Magic
By “T.J. Morris,” a man who believes computers are powered not by electricity, but by the fact that they are shaped like a box RECENT EVIDANCE in Scientific Community, regarding RIEMANN-ZETA HYPOTHESIS and EINSTEIN’S THEORY…
Who Killed JFK? : Killer Bees
By Baron von Honeymoore, a deranged beekeeper Dear readers, I bring you distressing news: this is for the people who demand the truth at WHATEVER COST. I have dedicated the past FORTY AND A HALF…
Paula Deen's Tupperware Party
It was a new day in the Deen household and the sun shone like a mustard stain on the blue apron of the sky. Paula heard the call of the rooster she would consume later…
Forlorn Love Poems by Artists Who Didn’t Deserve Those Girls in the First Place
#1: The Writer Beautiful Beautiful like the smile of a child With a deadly disease. Beautiful like a lone flower growing In an Antarctic wasteland. Beautiful like the pictures I have Of beautiful women covered…
6 Quick Tips to Lose Weight and Stick it to that Bitch, Julie Sanders
1. Get Motivated: Poor body image can lead to vicious cycles of low self-esteem and weight problems so to get motivated and show up that skinny whore, start your day by telling yourself something you…