Female Porn Stars: Baby Ruth KitKat Peppermint Pattie Mounds Snickers Male Porn Stars: Mr. Goodbar 3 Musketeers Almond Joy Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Sex Techniques: the Milky Way the Butterfinger the Twix the Charleston Chew…
Five Adorable Things to do During Homecoming 1. Complete the Dartmouth High-Fiving Decade (high-five a member of ten consecutive class years) 2. Caress the Fire. Like an infant. 3. Just ask for mixed drinks. Oh,…
by Matt Garczynski ’14 It was nights like this. When I’d tell myself I’m never working this beat again. But as I’d quickly find out, tonight wasn’t any other night. Wish I’d have known before…
Part II: Two Weeks Later Doug Feltz, food critic, sits in the dining room of La Vida, a Mexican-Armenian gourmet bistro, visibly shaken. He is wiping copious amount of his flopsweat on the tablecloth. He tries…
by Floyd Gibbons ’15 A few days ago, as many of you know, I lost my best friend in the whole wide world. I speak of course, of My Penis. I can’t remember a time…
Doug Feltz, food critic, wipes the flop sweat from his forehead. He is sitting in the dining room of Le Gaz, a French-Vietnamese molecular gastronomy cafeteria he has come here to review. The wait staff…
Coming to Dartmouth from Hawai’i has been an experience rife with surprises. Primarily were the icy winter conditions. No longer at a steady 80oF smelling and feeling like the inside of a tropical greenhouse, I…
by Alex Procton ’15 So, you’ve subjugated a race, nation, or planet of humans or other sentient beings. Time to begin your despotic rule over their lives! But first, have you set up an evil…
You’ve seen Where’s Waldo in picture form. But now, try Where’s Waldo: Book Edition. Somewhere in the text below, there’s Waldo. Try to find him! (And don’t cheat by using the search function!!!) Where’s Waldo…
By Michael Lenke ’15 Wenis Epidermis Masticate Asinine Coccyx Penal Fulguration Titillating Cutaneous Seditious Lampoon Muffin Bumbler Filial Butane Lubrication Colloquial Sextant Flapper Enervate Protractor Coax Salivate Uvula Churn Homonym Diphthong Shanty Ballista Gong Bungle…