Uses of SIRI: iPhone Digital Assistant

For Reenacting 2001: A Space Odyssey –

John: Okay Siri, I’m going to play the role of Dr. Heywood R. Floyd and I want you to play—
Siri: I know, HAL 9000. Okay, John, sounds—
John: What? No. I want you to pretend to be Daniel Richter, the guy in the ape suit at the beginning. Who the fuck is Hal 9000?
Siri: It’s the computer later on in—
John: No, screw that shit. Just pretend you’re that ape. Okay let’s start. [Putting on Dr. Floyd voice] Well hello ape. I just came back in my kick-ass time machine from the future to ape time. Yeah, no big deal. Wanna bang?
Siri: John, I don’t think—
John: Shut the fuck up Siri. I want to pretend I’m banging a dude in an ape suit.
Siri: John why don’t I just play HAL 9—
John: SHUT THE FUCK UP SIRI! Alright [Dr. Floyd voice again]. So, like I was saying…