11 People That Need to Sit The Fuck Down

1. That asshole on the airplane yelling about the kid behind him kicking his seat. Are you kidding me? This is a toddler you’re dealing with! Take a fucking seat, douche! 
2. That annoying girl in your class who can’t leave her opinions outside the classroom.  Are you Professor Kilroy? No? Yeah, I thought so. Sit down. 
3. That guy hamming it up for the girls in your acting class. Dude, come on. You’re a tool. 
4. That arrogant kid in your political science class who thinks he’s the shit.  Hey, smart guy? Yeah, you! You’re pretty cool and smart. So stand up! NOW SIT THE FUCK DOWN. 
5. That couple at the baseball game standing up at their seats in front of you. Uh…You guys make a better door than a window. 
6. That girl pacing back and forth in the library who’s really anxious about her exam. Can we get this girl a massage chair or something? Seriously calm down, take a breather. 
7. That really exhausted marathon runner.  What?! This man just ran 26.2 miles! Someone please get him a chair! Come on! Maybe some water and protein, too! 
8. That elderly woman with the walker. Where is this woman’s wheelchair? Someone go grab it immediately! 
9. That girl who just broke her leg. Well I mean, it looks like she has only one option right now. 
10. The guy that just got served his meal at a restaurant. Well, everyone’s gotta eat…better sit. 
11. The woman who just finished her speech at that presentation.  Well, she’s done. So…she should sit down.

-ER ’16