Dear Jackonomist: Seeking Macroeconomic Policy Advice For My Town

Dear Jackonomist,

Given everything the world has gone through this past year, I wanted my niece and nephew’s Christmas to be extra special. Knowing how much they love building and playing in their little “Lego Town,” I took them to the Lego Store to let them choose whatever pieces they wanted from the “Pick a Brick” section. 

They rushed to the wall with excitement, immediately shoveling gold bricks and shiny yellow, red, and blue dot pieces into their bins.

I thought that their enthusiasm came from the thrilling opportunity to find any lingering pieces needed to improve their cute little town; I know now just how foolishly optimistic I was. Little did I know, my enabling of misguided macroeconomic policy had shattered the foundation of Lego Town irreparably. 

Apparently these kids used these kinds of shiny bricks and pieces as currency in their town, inspired from Lego Star Wars: The Video Game. The pieces’ natural scarcity in Lego sets made for a well-controlled market in which the value of these pieces was consistent. But our shortsighted outing to the Lego store had flooded the town with this Lego money, causing rapid and severe economic inflation.

While a baseball cap in the Lego hat store previously cost one shiny red Lego piece, its price has now risen to an unprecedented three shiny blue Lego pieces. And with the increase in Lego borrowing costs, Lego small businesses have struggled to compete with Lego multinational corporations as a result of an increasingly globalized Lego economy. 

And believe me, the Lego consumers are feeling the squeeze as a result. 

If that wasn’t enough, the inflation has devalued Lego pension funds, forcing the Lego elderly back into the workforce to supplement their fixed incomes. In short, the monetary system is in shambles. 

To my shock and indignation, my niece and nephew seemed ambivalent to the havoc we’d unleashed. When I went to speak with them, I found my nephew quietly constructing a new set— the LEGO Creator Grand Emporium (set #10211). Is he joking? New public works projects during an inflationary period? The last thing the Lego economy needs is more spending, much less on frivolous vanity projects.

It was then that I knew I had to solve this problem myself. I cornered the bigwig union bosses of the Lego AFL-CIO, and asked them to show some leniency in wage negotiations, but it was no dice. The truth is, in this town, everyone’s looking out for themselves. The Lego mayor was the same story. The product of a corrupt political machine, it was clear that she was more interested in lining her Lego pockets with shiny red and blue Lego pieces than making the tough reforms needed to save the city.

If the town was to be rescued, it seemed to me its savior would have to come from the outside. I went to speak with my brother Howard and my sister-in-law Deborah. Unlike their children, they immediately recognized the severity of the issue at stake. My brother’s response was swift and straightforward: raise interest rates to twenty percent to get a firmer control over the Lego money supply. 

“It’s simple economics. The Keynesian consensus is over, and we simply can’t spend our way out of every crisis”, Howard opined with quiet determination.

My sister-in-law, however, was shocked by my brother’s proposal. She felt her husband was understating the impact that raising Lego interest rates would have on working class Lego families. 

“No no no, the ensuing recession would plunge millions of Lego families into poverty. These aren’t just numbers, Howard, these are Lego people, Lego communities, Lego children dreaming of going to Lego college! Have some compassion!” Instead, Deborah proposed that the Lego Town ties its currency to a limited-supply brick — the “Wheel Spoked 2×2 With Pin Hole, Light Bluish Gray” Standard. 

While I hoped this disagreement would resolve in a reasonable macroeconomic consensus, it’s clear that their competing economic viewpoints are not so easily reconciled. Worse, I’m back on my own again thanks to the new time constraint of Howard and Deborah beginning couple’s therapy. 

I feel awful for everything that’s happened. The economy’s wrecked, corruption is rampant, and the spineless Lego policymakers refuse to make the tough calls needed. And even worse, I’m devastated that my gift is going over so poorly. I just want to be the “cool uncle,” you know? I know there’s always next year to resolve this issue, but the kids’ birthdays are pretty far away.

I’m at a loss for what to do from here. Is there any way I could save my brother’s marriage, and more importantly, the economic security of Lego Town?

Thank you for your insight,

Worried 

---

Dear Worried, 

I’m glad you reached out. This is a serious problem, and you’re correct that Howard and Deborah are way off mark. My advice is simple. Raise interest rates to 10%, nationalize oil and gas industries, and curb union power. Corruption’s an issue, but it’s the sort of long-term problem you can’t worry about while inflation is spiraling. In the meantime, make sure you have a contingency plan in case the couple splits and the nation is fractured. With any luck, the couple can keep it together for the sake of the economy. Hope this helps. 

Paul Brickman

Senior Fellow at the Jackonomist 

---

– BH ’23 & AK ’23