Keggy’s Blog, 9/25
Hey everybody! Your favorite campus mascot Keggy here! I just had a pretty cool time walking around campus today. I did tons of stuff. I went to McNutt, the Green, Baker Library, and to the…
Articles
Out of Style
by Floyd Gibbons ’15 From the first time Man walked out of his cave and realized “Oh crap, its cold.” human beings have clothed themselves in an attempt to stay warm and avoid citations for…
Three Classes Every ’15 Should Take This Fall
Welcome ’15s! You’ve had a while or so to get settled here at Dartmouth and we hope it’s going smoothly. Sure, you’ve banged on the door of President Kim’s house asking if they still had…
Murderer Roommate
by Kevin Ibarra ’15 On the first day of orientation, my roommate bought a small potted plant. He then placed it near the window next to my desk and decided never to water it. Since…
The Wacky Adventures of James Joyce and His Amanuensis
IN WHICH the first line of A Portrait of the Artist As A Young Man is written James Joyce sat at his mahogany desk, his forehead furrowed, his chin perched upon his thumb and forefinger….
The Shmob that Swallowed Ty
There once was a shmob who hung out with Ty I don’t know why they hung out with Ty Perhaps they’ll die. There once was a shmob who hung out with Kate Kate was going…
Pictures and Words
THE FACTS
FACT: The average summer temperature in Hanover is 80 degrees. However, it is never within 20 degrees of actually being that temperature FACT: Dartmouth students want what they don’t have (FoCo, Tubestock, significant other), and…
Five Things: Heat Edition
Five Things Famous Historical Figures Did to Get Out of the Heat Marry a frigid woman (Bill Clinton) Get “lost” on your way to the South Pole (Ernest Shackleton) “Live” in Nepal (Tenzing Norgay) Retire…
A Limerick or Three
1. There once was a Jacko weekly, Finished, but so very meekly, Just awful it was, Especially ’cause, They’re usually written so chicly. 2. Thinking the Rapture was coming, I started in on a-strumming My…
5 Things You Didn’t Know About the Rapture
1. The Rapture has two drinking games: (Easy version): drink every time the world ends. (Hard version): drink every time the world doesn’t end 2. How we prepared for the Rapture (didn’t make out with…
Bible Studies
by Natta Goodman In light of the recent non-apocalypse, I have turned to the bible to seek solace in a world torn apart by religion. I was surprised to learn that the book was not filled…