Dartmouth To Announce Additional Set Of Lotteries For Those Willing To Forgo Other Basic Necessities

Dean of the College

Dear Returning Students,

You are receiving this message, today, because you submitted your Housing Intentions form and requested a bed assignment on campus for fall. We are pleased to announce a system of nested lotteries to determine what basic human necessities you will have access to. 

UPDATE

First, as expected, demand has exceeded our capacity. Fuck. While this is admittedly our fault (oopsies!), we will be relying on you, the student body, to fix it for us.

To help reduce the demand for rooms, the College is offering a one-time lottery incentive for up to 200 returning students who choose to withdraw their fall on-campus housing request and receive a $5000 payment in lieu of continuing to seek a bed on campus. 

For those who choose to keep their rooms, to help reduce the demand for furniture, the College is offering a second lottery incentive for students who choose to withdraw their furniture request. And, for those who choose to withdraw their furniture request, more lotteries will be implemented to determine who will be selected to receive electricity privileges, drinking water, and basic dignity. 

Thank you in advance for your patience. We know this has been a stressful time, and we hope we have been, and will continue to be, a large contributing factor for that. 

All my best,

Dean of Residential Life

– NS ’23 & DC ’23